“All we need is a place to breathe peacefully”
“All we need is a place to breathe peacefully”
Aren’t you the person who’s literally obsessed with yourself like you want something supremely comes after you to convince yourself to even look at other stuffs for create a interest or attraction with someone more than self?
Aren’t you that one old cultured dude with new trend in your circle repeating the same poses in all the selfiees ,not spending a lot of money on shopping and cancelling the plans to stay at home, still spoiling yourself by watching all unrealistic romantic dramas and believing it could happen and sometimes feels like you’re getting old enough to listen the same repeated bullshit emotional dramas and fakeness that you were been through in your whole life maybe that’s why you didn’t give a fuck about anything anymore???…
We all are looking for that one special person,who you can believe they will change everything then you started giving values to the person that you never met in real but still that’s all you created hypotheticaly in your mind and you are searching the qualities in every single person you met then you start doing the compatibility between the fictional personality to the real personality , if anything doesn’t fit into your expectations then you lost interest before you develop feelings.Now why you’re not showing interest for the people to hangout,to talk,to share stuffs is because you become the person already who you looking for with all the qualities that you were searching , so it’s takes time you to realize it you are that person.
I have no idea why i post this😐,maybe i’m this person.
Sometimes it takes decades to find the meaning of everything that you done in your life.you never get a graduation if you don’t spend your time in highschools and universties , you never get a meaning of your love life if you stop loving and being there for each other forever,you never get a successful career if you don’t believe yourself when your boss treat you like a shit but still you work your ass off and you cannot achieve those decades and decades of time,efforts and energy of investment without rejection the alternatives.
We are define by what we choose to reject in particular phase,you can’t walk on a different path on a same time simultaneously ,you have to reject one even if it’s healthy decisions yet they require rejections in all the time,something in order to value something it’s often need both giving and receiving.so don’t look for a meaning of life before you start it.
Seek what you really capable of and think what you really deserve for it ,believe me the process is everything ,the success is just makes you to move forward but the process behind it is what makes you the person to do in real,start living it.
These 20’s is already messing me up in every possible way, practicing and understanding what’s happening inside my mind. Getting more motivation and inspire from TED talks nowadays a lot, cause lack of self motivation at my work place.Most of the time in office, less time with family and friends,maintaining my cool as well maybe this is how it’s actually works usually or maybe i’m not aware of it anyway because i’m new to this cooperate transformation to the next phase of life ,i heard it somewhere which moment you longing for so badly you want it to happen in your life??…you would think that will change everything,the moment you waited for,the moment you dreamed of ??…and then when it’s happen in real time you don’t feel the same excitement and curiousness or anything,you’ll just watch it happen and pass off to other stuff ,maybe that’s a growth,the pain is the process of everything and that’s i’m facing it right now .
Even if i managed to stand up,all this fucking social media motivational memes,quotes and sayings is fucking me again whenever i scroll a feeds everyday….seriously?? Sometimes I thought I might be a biggest hypocrite as far i know myself,i’ll tell people don’t lose hope,giving up is not gonna solve anything,be strong,let it be blah blah blah kind of pampering words you know, to make them feel better,but here i’m,barely holding on.
Figuring out what’s pissing me off is even a big deal for me right now!!..thinking about every sort of crap too early.At least i’m tryna hard to don’t take anything into my mind for now,just enjoying the process .Seeing everything fall at it place and also watching everything falls down on a other side but i love the way i’m becoming to, i’m setting a values and metrics to myself,maybe that’s why i feel so hard to take it ,maybe this process will need some balance to set it free.Self-remembrance??why is it so difficult!!..Read it somewhere
“giving up a values you’ve depended on for years is going to feel
disorienting,as if you don’t really know right from wrong anymore.
This is hard,but it’s normal”
Changing values,changing priorities(anyway it’ll change,it’s natural). I started doing things rather than thinking of it, we don’t always control what happens to us,but we do control how we interpret what happen to us,as well as how we respond.I already mentioned in my another post,we can able to create, edit and interpret our stories where ever we want to,how you want people to hear it and understand because it’s your fucking story.you can change all the negative into positive and the other way around.Growing up with a experiences,a usual, ordinary and routine stuff i rather like the way it is maintaining a healthy friendship,started meeting new people ,more talking and stalking,more laughing,reading good books,blog whenever i feel like,spending more time with myself rather than someone else,debating with hormones,discussing and trying to understand how my mind is working most of a time and filtering out what really matters.
this year will definitely going to be rocking one,RESOLUTION???…really??? i can’t even remember my last year resolution,you know a lot can happen within a year,fuck this “new year,new me” thing,of course i’m going to be different person next year,shit will happen,i’ll trust a process,cheers.
i’ll drop this note here though i’ll repost it next year.
I used to think the whole meaning of life is having a perfect life, a perfect women, perfect student, perfect employee, perfect girlfriend .so i started searching for a top colleges to do my Under Graduation , a ideal job but everything which I thought will lead a perfect life isn’t the way in reality, I felt unhappy, depressed and anxious, I come to know what I searched in all this years is meaningless because i grown up with the culture were everybody listens to the story of successful person but nobody knows the story of failure. we believe the words of the successful people and follows their path ,every living in this world is a reflection of some one’s life ,but is this makes you a truly happy and satisfied person?? NO. there is always a emptiness in every person.
we’re always in a rush of settling in our life ,i used to dream more about my life how it would be ,how i’m going to work , future plans and all, to engage myself at everything.
I think, how well we create our surroundings is matters more ,because in our young days all of our thoughts is connected to the higher reality ,we think beyond our limits, we believe having a good job with a good pay will satisfy us .we thought happiness is buying something which makes us feel happy but it’s not,it feels less about what you want than what you give .
In our society , first of all to lead a happy life ,we just want to do what we’re interested ,but in our culture,if you score a good mark, you don’t get a course what you looking for, whether you gotta a course you have interested in, you’re not able to go for the job related to that ,everything is lack of time, lack of decision making ,we’re just going with the flow .
Our culture is obsessed with happiness , we give more time to find a path of our life than being happy. i believe finding meaning of the life makes your path fulfilled . happiness puts you in comfort zone and live in the moment. So we feel difficult to stepping out of our ease life. Most of us disrespect a lot of people who initiate to talk with us …..we reject them without realizing it by checking your phone when someone is talking to you ,and through facial expression ,we’ve lack of paying attention to the present.
I always laid back in any relationship . I’ll create a strong bond with each other, but after sometimes I stop talking with them but i still have the same love and bond just beacause I feel depressed & anxious of other stuffs in my life that distracted to affect my present .after then I came up to them but they’re become changed person, then it’s end up with guilt.
Life gives you a purpose , something makes you live for, someone to their family , someone to their children or to their own selves and for some WHY NOT that moves you forward . sometimes your own selves feels helpless. At one time I’m completely involved in the stuffs that I love to do (writing ,family, friends, my work)i get so in the zone without realizing the time and situation but the very next moment I feel like I’m done with all this.
I think the mixture of emotions in every phases and the experience you gain from all can change you. This will create a story of yourself to tell about yourself. To understand who you are, every events in your life made you a different person, you’ll find a new meaning of life after your graduation, after a love, after a break.
We’ll tell stories about what you lost and what you gained , it’s all about bad is redeemed by the good . I’m hopeless in my life before a years but my growth and purpose of living creates a hope in my life.we can edit, retell a story , some people get help from retelling their stories , we can interrupt our stories into different situations , we find a solution of unsolved puzzles by applying our experience into the new situations ,which we forget to solve in our past, but we refilled it by various situations, how your defining experience shaped you, living a meaningful life takes so much work , you can’t change a story in overnight. It takes time, years after all self – realization we constantly creating our story into the track, sometimes it get off track. The chasing of happiness can make people unhappy, everyone say that happiness is success but for me happiness is how I move on with all odds in my life, you can be anything in this world, YOU DECIDE.